It’s confirmed…the makers of Jockey underwear read my blog.

Just going to get this out of the way before we go on to the story about corporate espionage.

I feel like a truck ran over me..noticed a bump..backed up…panicked and took off again.  Can’t tell if I am fighting off the flu, depression, or nazi’s..

I can’t sleep, I’m really hungry…weird pains in my eye.  Work is pretty stressful and I am sure this is the issue.  Overall I just feel crappy.  I will force a run tomorrow for sure.  I skipped out on crossfit tonight because I think that slinging weights around would be dangerous at the moment.  My focus and co-ordination are a bit off.

I think the one thing I hate about getting old is that when I felt this way in the past I just would swear off drinking for awhile.  Now, my brain thinks Cancer!  Stroke! Heart Attack!    ugggh.

Sorry-  Very negative post so far, really not meant to be.  Well it is, but I promise to end on a funny note.

One last thing.  My last entry was not written very well.  I think I was still high on endorphins or something.  I re-read from the start of my blog and sometimes I write pretty clearly and other times you can tell I’m writing in a post run state of mind.

Now let’s talk about Jockey.  I promise no lurid pictures of me in my underwear, but what seems to becoming a trend, I’ll be writing about stuff that might make some people squirm.  First, you need to read up on the snack pocket.  It’s a long post and the snack pocket is just a minor thing buried in the story but it is VITAL to understand the rest of this story.   I’ll even give you a nice little link to take you there.   Click Me!  I just realized looking through my old posts that I did post a picture of myself in my underwear..they weren’t lurid though.

I am very picky about underwear.  Really picky.  I grew up wearing those horrible tighty whities.  (Am I the only one who thinks they look like diapers?)  There was this brief interlude with a weird set of calvin klein euro speedo looking things.  Think Michael Phelps without all the medals and muscles. They were a christmas gift and I was in 8th grade and already easily traumatized so they didn’t last long.   I then moved on to boxers and spent a long time in boxer land.  I HATED them but hey, they weren’t diapers.   Then, one day I discovered boxer briefs.  It was like the angels of all things underwear came to earth and blessed me with the perfect piece of clothing.  For awhile they were great..until I learned that cotton stretches and wears out fast…now I was just wearing a droopy pair of diapers.  Still , it was better than boxers..and better than euro nut huggers and still better than asylum diapers.

A few years ago I was shopping at Kohls and noticed a new style of boxer short that had some spandex in them.  The company that made them was Jockey and they were perfect.  They stayed snug, didn’t stretch.  Kept stuff from ..um..bouncing around.  Hey! that’s important when you run.    I have been very happy with them and I’m now entering another underwear cycle so I asked my wife to pick some up if she happens to go out shopping anytime soon.  If not, I would eventually get to Kohls to purchase more.

Well, Last night she came home with a few pairs and said she couldn’t find my usual and picked up a few new ‘styles’.   She hands me a pair of black Adidas branded boxer briefs and two jockey branded ones.  The adidas looked great and fit great. Hell I am wearing them right now!

The jockey ones..  I looked at them and had to double take…Right there in the front was…A SNACK POCKET!  I mean it’s the opposite of what I was thinking but it’s the same thing!  LOOK!

Sneaky snack pocket

I couldn’t believe it.  Just to make sure I started trying out snacks.

Pocket Fuel fits

Looked like there was plenty of room so I thought, why not try more.

Yummy

Still more room..but running out of snacks.

Yea..I don’t know either.

But then it dawned on me…

Oh yea… Yes that is a Founders breakfast stout.. If you haven’t had one you need to..and no you can’t have this one or the other one that hasn’t been in my crotch.

I think this is the end of this post.  I mean,  where do you go after the beer in the crotch shot?

Back to running tomorrow I promise.

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Categories: Uncategorized | 5 Comments

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5 thoughts on “It’s confirmed…the makers of Jockey underwear read my blog.

  1. spottedimages

    I had to come back and read this again…. I may even post a link to this in my next blog!!!

  2. My friend’s kiddo has an “underwear pocket”, its where his plastic sword goes. No, really.
    Good stuff.

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